The Sad Reality

I admit I have my own flaws, a lot actually! But I don't think these flaws should prevent me from having my opinion on things - from standing firm on what I believe in. I have always been like this. It is definitely not in my character to just go with the flow, to be where everybody is, if it is against my belief. That is just so not me!

Recent turn of events put me in this state right now. Right versus wrong. I chose to stand firm on my belief, thus, somehow alienating me from people whom I considered as family. Is it all worth it? I can only hope. 

My mind and my heart just cannot accept the reality that I was confronted with - that one can never be assured of anything! That the only thing that is permanent on this world is CHANGE! All efforts, all the time, money and love you give and invested can just be forgotten in just a snap of a finger! Sad but true. 

And the reason?! Because they have found someone new. Someone who is more accessible. Someone who is much more convenient! And because of that convenience, people just chose to eat their words, forget about their earlier principles and just welcome the change with open arms! How easily they have adjusted!  How I wish I can be just like them, can easily change mascara whenever needed. But I am not like them. 

But, who's really to blame? The forgotten one? For not being able to sustain his worth?! Or that somebody new who's doing everything in  his power to fit in, to be accepted?! Or that very insecure person who cannot just be contented?! That one person who's always on the lookout in finding someone better, despite knowing that he will be hurting someone in the process?! Or is it the people surrounding all of them?! For not being responsible  enough to try to explain and make sense of what is really happening and the consequences all these things will bring?! But, how can they be blamed when they were just clinging on the knife's edge, as brought about their current circumstances?! Though I believe that still, we all have our choices! We still have the last say in everything! Or maybe, they simply do not care as long as it proved to be advantageous on their part! Or is it just me?! For emphatizing too much! For trying to believe in the word "Fairness" and for hoping that I can make them realize the worth and sacrifices of that someone who was already forgotten... For believing in the fact that wrong doings are meant to be corrected ,not tolerated! Maybe it's really me. Maybe I am still living in a world of make-believe! Believing so much in HONESTY, LOVE & FOREVER! I guess these words really are very rare nowadays. I can only hope it can still be true to me! Maybe.

I know it is not right to expect people to return every favor you will give, but a little acknowledgment and respect will never hurt... Or do they?! 

One thing is for sure though, one is only as good as his last performance! All your past actions and good deeds won't  mean anything much anymore come evaluation day! 

And this kept me thinking, should I still continue? Should I stay? Or should I just walk away - fearing that all my efforts may likewise be put to waste. Afraid of being forgotten as well! 

:(